Comments on: How to Be a Man: Be Confident

By: Diane Corriette

Diane Corriette — Fri, 16 May 2008 06:47:24 +0000

No problem Dan I knew what you meant as soon as I read it!

Well Chris, whoever wrote it they definitely are words that resonate. Too many great things are abandoned or never started because of fear.

By: Chris

Chris — Fri, 16 May 2008 01:04:33 +0000

Sadly to say Diane ….”He’ll surrender to fate when necessary, but he won’t surrender to fear” are not my words - I came across this sentence while browsing through some of my favourite personal development blogs I read constantly.

These words hit so close to home for me, and In some cosmic/strange way they represent the man I am.

By: Dan

Dan — Thu, 15 May 2008 21:01:16 +0000

There you have it. What I should have said was that too much (too high, unrealistic) self-esteem may be a dangerous superiority complex. Thanks, Diane!

By: Diane Corriette

Diane Corriette — Thu, 15 May 2008 20:52:17 +0000

High self esteem has been recognised as a big an issue as low self esteem/confidence. Its not talked about much but people with high self esteem arrange wars and genocides, they create mass suicides… but they are not truly people of confidence. Do a search and you will find many things written on it.

http://www.self-confidence.co.uk/self/esteem/high.html

What’s being talked about here is balanced self esteem. Believing in your ability to succeed despite what reality may be telling you. I know many people who in the midst of having no money and about to lose everything… house, car, family gone etc have turned it around because they kept a strong belief in their ability to do that.

I love the end line about surrending to fate but not to fear. It’s a great post and it looks like its a piece from one of those classic books like “think and grow rich” or “acres of diamonds” or something… or did you write it yourself Chris?

Diane Corriette
Dominican Diaspora

By: Dan

Dan — Thu, 15 May 2008 17:39:34 +0000

Character is destiny and pride goes before a fall. When a cowardly lying national figure postures it can lead to deaths of innocents and of brave but misled soldiers. I cited Bush because what good would it do to cite as an example of self-OVERconfidence because what good would it do to have cited someone nobody has ever heard of?

We all have failures. But insanity is doing the same thing over an over and expecting different results. Edison took many tries at finding the right lamp filament, but he tried a different one each time. I think he was more persistent than confident.

I did not do that many experiments of note.

I would like to end this thread.

By: Veselo

Veselo — Thu, 15 May 2008 16:29:59 +0000

To be awful husbund is it means do not to be a confident about your purpose or what you do? They were confident enough about their purpose to accomplish that most of people didn’t never discover before or afraid to do.

By: Joel Halfwassen

Joel Halfwassen — Thu, 15 May 2008 15:27:08 +0000

Dan - I happen to agree with you on Bush, however, my issue is that this blog entry is not the proper place to take a shot at politics you disagree with. Especially when the main focus is on the country of Dominica and on issues of personal development. Veselo is correct. You may have a viewpoint or an issue, but what do you do with it? Do you take it and channel it into something productive? Or do you point out the flaws in others. What is that biblical quote…he who is without sin cast the first stone or something like that.

I would like to turn this around a bit to something a little more inspired. You say you are a retired physicist. And in my imagination about you I would assume that you worked on various experiments throughout your career. And in those experiments you probably had 100 failures for each brilliant success. But each of those failures brought you new knowledge or insight into the inner workings of the universe, probably more so then what the success brought you. I am curious…do you have a particular time in your mind where you were on the verge of giving up on a project except your confidence in yourself and your experience allowed you to push through to a resounding success?

By: Dan

Dan — Thu, 15 May 2008 14:24:42 +0000

I am a retired physicist. Albert Einstein was personally troubled, was an awful husband to his first wife. Edison was lonely and simply persistent; a loner because he’d been deafened by someone boxing his ears when he was a boy. Writers? How many successful ones were suicides (Hemingway) and/or homosexual (mentally ill, like Tennessee Williams, Gore Vidal).

Bush was swaggering around on an aircraft carrier deck dressed as if he’s landed a plane (he had not) and inviting the enemy to “bring it on” — see what we got!

By: Veselo

Veselo — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:45:13 +0000

How about Albert Einstein, Tomas Eddison, any succesfull writers, artists and etc.? Where the world will be without their “be confident”? This is just as an electricity. You can cook the food or you also can cook a man. On what you are prefer to focus and what do you want to support?

By: Dan

Dan — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:23:41 +0000

What Chris is doing is fine. But personality drives politics. Bush is an extreme case, but other politicians are driven by self-perception and fear of appearing weak, and hence swagger, act macho too, and cause suffering as a result. My point is that Bush is a visible example of why one should not be self OVER-confident.