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For many years the attitude in Dominica towards men “chastising” their women to where it is now seen as physical abuse, is an example of how perceptions change. For generations, a number of Dominican women, without seeing themselves as masochistic, often voiced their appreciation of a man who gave them some “licks or beatings”. They saw this as a sign that the man cared for them, and if not he would have been indifferent to the others.

Weird as it sounds, this type of thinking is not far removed from that where we commend chastisement (corporal punishment) of children as a necessary result of caring for them. While a woman is not a child, the idea that “love” was what prompted the beatings appealed not only to some men, but the women being beaten as well, perhaps in an attempt to rationalise the experience.

Nowadays, no such ideas are favoured and female magistrates have warned that they will be dealing harshly with men who beat women. I’m anticipating that if the shoe is on the other foot, where it is the woman who is found guilty of beating her man, will the court also not be amused. I’ve heard on many instances where men have reported abuse from women – and these cases were never investigated.

The law warns that matters “of a domestic nature are not going to be treated lightly by the courts,” and advised people about the need to be clear about ending relationships. It is the growing tendency of many relationships to have physical abuse as a feature that is causing concern. The idea of men beating up women and then kissing and making up or vise-versa is not encouraged these days, maybe because a growing number of such situations have been getting out of hand, sometimes with fatal results.

What is ironic about those who find themselves in a “chastising” mode is that it is always the weaker partner who usually is chastised. The stronger one, however wrong or “deserving of being chastised”, need have no such worry or fear.

On the other hand, some men wouldn’t dare lift their hands in anger towards certain women who they know will not take it lying down. There is a saying which goes “Money don’t climb prickle Trees” – men who beat women usually know the ones they can safely beat up without the women fighting back. They will not risk beating certain women since they know they will suffer physically as a result.

This is why when men beat up their women it is often said that they “take advantage of the women”, while in truth it is not the women these men “take advantage of” but the situation. However much men enjoy beating up women, they know that in certain situations it would be unwise to do so…Come on guys we’re are better than this – lets love and respect our queens.

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5 Comments »

Comment by Dan
2008-09-04 17:41:24

A man that hits a woman, or even raises his hand as if to threaten a woman, or even shouts at a woman is a coward.

Love and kindness and talking things over nd attempting to understand the other person’s feelings are the only way.

 
Comment by mark
2009-05-27 12:01:11

my name is mark an i have beaten a women who says she still loves me even though im no good 4 her all we do is argue with each other and im scared of what might happen next

 
Comment by jazz
2009-09-22 04:00:13

women beating is bad

 
Comment by Joseph
2011-01-09 06:06:38

Ive been wit this girl for almost 2 yearz now…thing is I’m not the beater, she is…and as much as I get the urge to defend myself, I don’t…and talking it over in kindness doesn’t help shit…sometimes u may have to get physical, point I’m trying to make, is the reason y therez so much women beaterz, is cuz they were all man beaterz at a point in time…all we want to do is defend ourselves…itz harder to do then to just say it…but itz not our fault we were made tough…

 
Comment by Crystal
2011-02-18 16:00:17

I agree with the first statment… Every man that puts their hands on a women r cowards… and why I think a man puts his hands on a women cuz they like to feel incontroll… And a man that has put their hands on a women will always put their hands on a women… Aka once a women beater always a women beater…the only time I feel that a man should put his hands on a women is if the women is two times his size and she swings on him first other then that a man could hold a women down and calm her down or go to the police….

 
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